10 Secrets to Keep Your Boyfriend Forever
Ah, long-lasting love. It’s the stuff fairy tales, Hallmark movies, and late-night ice cream binges are made of. You see, everyone thinks they want a fairy tale, but let’s remember, even Cinderella lost a shoe, and Snow White? Poor thing had to deal with a malicious queen.
The meaning of a long-lasting relationship
A forever kind of love isn’t about having a picture-perfect life where birds magically make your bed (although that would be cool). It’s about being two imperfect pieces of a puzzle that somehow fit.
The Gita aptly teaches us that “We are kept from our goal not by obstacles but by a clear path to a lesser goal.” So aim high, aim for the forever, and don’t settle for the lesser tales.
Now, you might think that once you’ve landed Mr. Right, it’s all rainbows and unicorns. But let’s be honest, even unicorns have bad hair days. And rainbows? They come after rain. Every relationship faces its storms. It’s about dancing in the rain rather than waiting for it to pass.
After all, as Judaic wisdom puts it, “Challenges are what make life interesting; overcoming them is what makes life meaningful.”
1. Always Prioritize Communication
Why Communication Matters
Y’all, I swear Solomon could’ve been a relationship guru. He said, “Death and life are in the power of the tongue…” (Proverbs 18:21). Now, I know he wasn’t exclusively talking about how we chat with our partners, but come on, how apt is that?
If you’ve ever sent a text without an emoji to your significant other and watched the apocalyptic fallout, you’d think twice about overlooking the whole communication thing.
Remember when Moses had those, erm, ‘slight’ misunderstandings with Pharaoh? Yeah, “Let my people go!” could’ve taken a drastically different turn if ol’ Mo didn’t put his foot down.
Similarly, saying what you mean and meaning what you say is the bedrock of trust in any relationship. No one wants to be dating the modern equivalent of the Tower of Babel.
Read: Your Husband’s Decision to Be a Stay-at-Home Dad
Tips for Healthy Communication
Before you put on your Biblical robes and mount the pulpit to communicate, let’s get some pointers straight. First off, just because David was great at expressing his feelings (Psalms, anyone?), doesn’t mean that you have to break into a song every time you’ve got something to say. But hey, if you’ve got the vocal chords, why not?
Active listening isn’t just nodding while secretly planning your next Chipotle run. It’s about being present. Be like Mary, sitting at the feet of Jesus, soaking in every word, rather than like Martha, distracted with many things (Luke 10:38-42).
Now, I’m not saying don’t be like Martha because we all love someone who can whip up a storm in the kitchen, but when it’s chat time, leave the tacos out of it.
When it comes to feedback, channel the wisdom of Solomon, not the sassiness of Jonah (before the whale incident). Speak the truth in love (Ephesians 4:15) and remember, gentle words are a tree of life, but deceitful words crush the spirit (Proverbs 15:4).
So, the next time you’re tempted to say, “You ALWAYS forget to take out the trash,” maybe switch it up to, “Hey love, could you help me out with the trash?” There’s a world of difference, trust me.
And in the wise words of Buddha, “If you propose to speak, always ask yourself, is it true, is it necessary, is it kind?” Although not from the Bible, it surely resonates with the spirit of healthy communication, doesn’t it?
Just a little food for thought from a millennial who’s seen one too many relationship texts ending in an unnecessary dramatic mic drop.
2. Keep the Romance Alive
Date Nights are a Must
Did you know God was the first event planner? I mean, think about it – He set aside a whole day, the Sabbath, just to hang with us! We should probably take a hint. It’s easy to get caught up in the “Netflix and chill” (minus the implied meanings, of course) rhythm and forget the magic of an old-fashioned date.
Remember, the Song of Solomon isn’t just there to make Sunday school awkward. It’s a testament to the fireworks and goosebumps that come with love and romance.
Want a pro tip for unforgettable date nights? Dive deep into the Bible, find a story that gives you both the feels, and recreate it. Maybe not the whole Jonah and the whale thing – we don’t want anyone getting swallowed whole.
But imagine a rooftop picnic reminiscent of the time David first spotted Bathsheba. Minus the drama, please.
Read: Mastering the Art of Texting in Relationships
Small Gestures, Big Impact
If the Bible taught me anything, it’s that grand gestures are memorable, but it’s the small, everyday things that truly melt our hearts. Remember when Jesus washed the feet of his disciples? Pretty low-key, yet incredibly profound.
You don’t have to literally wash your boyfriend’s feet (unless that’s your thing), but never underestimate the power of small acts of service.
And hey, while a parting of the Red Sea style surprise might earn you some major cool points, sometimes all it takes is a thoughtful note tucked inside a lunchbox or an “I prayed for you today” text. You know what’s better than a surprise birthday party? A surprise “just because I love you” party on a completely random Tuesday!
Ever heard of the saying from the Bhagavad Gita, “Whatever happened, happened for the good”? Whatever is happening, is happening for the good?” Now, I’m pretty sure they weren’t talking about that time your boyfriend forgot your anniversary.
But life’s a mix of grand and ordinary moments. Celebrate both with surprises, gifts, and handwritten notes. Because in the end, love is a sum of all those beautifully scripted and candid moments.
3. Stay Independent
Importance of Personal Space
You know who was super into personal space? Jesus. Yup, our main man would occasionally head to the mountains or into the desert for some me-time with the Big Guy Upstairs.
Now, I’m not suggesting you trek to the nearest wilderness every time you need a breather (although, post a pic if you do). But giving each other room to breathe can be a game-changer.
Being glued to your partner’s hip might seem cute at first, but ever heard the saying, “Familiarity breeds contempt”? Trust me, there’s a reason it wasn’t “Familiarity breeds more Netflix binges together.” Keeping that sense of mystery and intrigue alive is like the relationship equivalent of those popping candies.
You never know when you’ll get a delightful surprise!
Read: What to Do When Your Boyfriend Ignores You
Pursue Individual Passions
Adam had gardening. Eve, presumably, had her own Edenic pursuits. And while their joint snake-related debacle is best left unemulated, there’s something to be said for having individual passions. When was the last time you lost yourself in something you love, then later shared that joy with your partner?
It’s like when Paul went tent-making – he didn’t drag the other apostles into it, but you bet they loved hearing the stories.
Being each other’s biggest cheerleader is all the rage these days. Encourage your boyfriend’s Saturday morning bike rides or his secret passion for cooking dishes that challenge the very definition of edible.
Remember, as the Dhammapada says, “Just as a flower does not pick and choose the bees that come to it, but receives them all equally with sweet pollen, so too should you welcome all experiences without judging or discriminating.”
Embrace his quirks, and let him embrace yours. Because two people exploring the world separately, then coming together to chat about it, is the original version of dual-screen streaming. And way more romantic.
4. Stay Vulnerable
Sharing Your Fears and Dreams
Pop quiz! What did Moses, David, and Peter have in common besides an impressive facial hair game? Ding, ding, ding! Vulnerability. They had their low moments, their fears, and dreams, and they didn’t shy away from sharing them. Heck, David made an entire playlist (Psalms, for those in the back) out of his emotional rollercoaster rides.
Peeling back the layers isn’t just about sharing which flavor of Ben & Jerry’s gets you misty-eyed (though for the record, mine’s Cookie Dough). It’s about letting someone into the VIP section of your heart. Remember when Peter had his little water-walking adventure with Jesus?
He started sinking the moment he got scared, but he also had the guts to step out in the first place. That’s the kind of vulnerability we’re shooting for. Not the sinking. The stepping out.
Let’s face it; life’s not all rainbows and unicorns. Or in biblical terms, milk and honey. Every time you share a dream, a fear, or even a silly thought, you add another brick to the fortress of trust and understanding.
You’re basically telling your boyfriend, “Hey, I trust you with this part of me.” And that, my friends, is worth more than a thousand TikTok duets (though those are fun, too).
I remember a quote from the Bhagavad Gita that goes, “A person can rise through the efforts of his own mind; or draw himself down, in the same manner. Because each person is his own friend or enemy.”
A bit deep for a Tuesday afternoon read, right? But sharing our vulnerabilities, our highs and lows, makes sure we’ve got someone on our team, cheering or supporting, no matter where we are on the emotional spectrum.
So, next time you’re hesitating to open up about that crazy dream where you were a tap-dancing monk, dive right in! After all, vulnerability is the secret sauce that adds a dash of ‘forever’ to any relationship. Who knew?
Read: Ruth & Boaz’s Love Story
5. Mutual Respect
Setting Boundaries
Boundaries. They’re not just for property disputes and those annoying “Do Not Enter” signs. If you dig into the Good Book, even God had His boundaries. Remember the Ten Commandments? Yep, that wasn’t just some celestial to-do list; it was God setting boundaries with His favorite peeps.
But let’s bring it back down to our millennial level. You ever had someone take the last slice of pizza without asking? Anarchy, right? That’s what happens when boundaries get crossed. Except in relationships, it’s not about pizza (or maybe it is, we all have our things).
Boundaries are like the relationship’s firewall. Keeps the pesky viruses out and maintains a healthy internal system. The whole “two become one” thing is poetic and all, but let’s be real, no one’s trying to become a clone of their partner. I mean, have you seen his choice in socks?
Respecting Differences
From Exodus to Leviticus, if you’ve spent more than five minutes skimming the Bible, you’d see that people are, well, a hot mess of differences. Moses was a prince turned shepherd, Paul was a tent-making Pharisee, and Esther? She was a beauty queen with guts.
All different, yet each played a starring role in the biblical hall of fame.
But what’s the 411 for us mere mortals in relationships? It’s simple. Embrace the differences. If he’s into heavy metal and you’re more of a K-pop enthusiast, that’s just another reason for some hilarious karaoke nights. If you love thrillers and he cries during rom-coms, well, that’s date night sorted for months.
There’s a quote in the Dhammapada that says, “Conquer the angry one by not getting angry; conquer the wicked by goodness.” Now, I’m not saying your boyfriend’s wicked for thinking pineapple belongs on pizza.
But respecting differences, especially the pineapple-y ones, means letting love triumph over the occasional urge to roll your eyes (or toss a pizza out the window).
Because at the end of the day, it’s these little quirks and differences, respected and celebrated, that make your relationship as unique as David’s slingshot skills. And we all know how that turned out.
6. Spice Things Up in the Bedroom
Exploring Fantasies
Before we dive into the uncharted waters of, erm, “fantasies,” let’s take a second to appreciate the biblical version of Fifty Shades – The Song of Solomon. I mean, that dude was descriptive. Blush-worthy even.
And all under the watchful eye of the Almighty. Proof that love, intimacy, and yes, even a little sultriness, all have their sacred place.
Communication is the name of the game here, people. And I’m not just talking about the “Did you take out the trash?” kind. Getting vocal about what you like, what you’re curious about, and what’s a no-go zone is key.
Think of it as building your own ark – you’ve got to make sure you both know what’s getting on board. And what isn’t. (I’m looking at you, unicorns).
Read: How to Be a Sophisticated Man
Trying New Things Together
In the grand timeline of history, venturing out of your comfort zone is a must. Remember when Abraham went on an impromptu road trip because God said so? Or when Jonah took that unexpected deep-sea adventure inside a whale? Point being, the Good Book is all about trying new things, albeit sometimes reluctantly.
Now, I’m not suggesting a belly of a fish as your next bedroom theme, but a little novelty can go a long way. Maybe it’s as simple as changing the scenery, introducing a new playlist (Hillsong, anyone?), or just investing in some mood lighting (let there be light, but you know, the dim, romantic kind).
The Bhagavad Gita says, “Set thy heart upon thy work, but never on its reward.” Which, when you squint a little and tilt your head, can be applied right here. It’s about the journey, the discovery, and the joy of shared experiences.
So, while you’re mixing things up, remember that the ultimate goal isn’t just the thrill of the new, but the deeper bond it creates.
After all, a little adventure keeps the heart young and the love fresher than that loaf of Ezekiel bread you’ve been meaning to try.
7. Financial Transparency
Money Talks: Less Taboo, More Clarity
Manna from heaven would be ideal. I mean, daily bread, literally falling from the sky? Sign me up. But since that’s not how most of us roll in the 21st century, let’s address the golden calf in the room: finances.
First things first, you remember that parable where the master gives out talents to his servants and they have to make wise investments? Well, think of that the next time you’re tempted to hide that shoe shopping spree or clandestine comic book collection purchase from your other half.
No burying your ‘talent’ (or credit card statement) in the ground!
Regular financial check-ins.
You know how in Proverbs it says, “Honest scales and balances belong to the Lord”? Let’s just apply that to our bank accounts for a sec. Set a date, brew some coffee (or tea, if you’re feeling particularly British), and dive into those numbers together. Remember, Jesus hung out with tax collectors, so there’s no judgment here.
Joint financial goals and dreams.
Building your modern-day Ark? Saving for that pilgrimage to the Holy Land (or maybe just Disneyland)? These shared dreams need a financial plan! Heck, even Solomon had to budget for that temple. Jot down your dreams, no matter how big or small, and start planning.
The Buddha once said, “Do not dwell in the past, do not dream of the future, concentrate the mind on the present moment.” So, while dreaming big is great, always remember to focus on the now and what you can do today for a brighter tomorrow.
Financial transparency isn’t just about avoiding the “I spent how much on that?!” fights; it’s about trust, building a future, and maybe even getting closer to that manna-from-heaven lifestyle. One can dream, right?
Read: Is It Okay for a Christian to Date?
8. Keep Learning About Each Other
The Never-ending Journey
Remember Adam? No, not your buddy from youth group, I’m talking about the OG Adam. Can you imagine waking up one day and Eve just suddenly has a penchant for fig leaves instead of… well, nothing? “New outfit, who dis?”
Okay, maybe not the most biblically accurate imagery, but let’s roll with it. Like Adam, we must understand that our partners evolve. They’re not static figurines but living, breathing wonders of God. So, let’s dive in.
Benefits of perpetual discovery.
Alright, flashback to Moses and the burning bush. Just when he thought he knew all there was to know about shrubbery – boom! – God showed up and turned his world upside down. That’s kind of what perpetual discovery in a relationship is like. Without the fire… usually.
The more you discover, the more layers you peel back, the more in awe you are of your partner’s complexities. It’s like getting a new book of the Bible to read every day. And who wouldn’t want that? Keep being curious; it’s how you keep the flame (pun intended) alive.
Techniques like love languages and relationship quizzes.
Ever thought of what Jesus’ love language would be? Words of affirmation? Acts of service? Trick question; it’s all of them. However, we mere mortals tend to lean towards one or two. And understanding your partner’s love language is like decoding the Dead Sea Scrolls of affection.
Now, while you’re at it, sprinkle in some relationship quizzes. Not the “Which Apostle are you?” kind, but genuine ones that unravel deeper facets of your beau. The Bhagavad Gita says, “A person who is not disturbed by the incessant flow of desires can obtain happiness.”
Think of these quizzes as your map to navigate the flowing river of your partner’s desires.
Revelations aren’t just in the Bible, folks. They’re in every glance, every gesture, every previously unknown favorite ice cream flavor of your loved one. So, channel your inner explorer, and may your relationship always feel like the Book of Genesis – forever beginning and forever fresh.
9. Show Appreciation Often
Words of Affirmation
You know, when God said, “It is good” after each day of Creation, He wasn’t just giving Himself a pat on the back. He was setting a precedent for the rest of us. Expressing appreciation and recognizing the goodness around us.
Now, I’m not saying your boyfriend’s morning bed hair is a divine masterpiece, but a little “you look cute” wouldn’t hurt.
Daily compliments.
A compliment a day keeps insecurities at bay. It’s not rocket science. When was the last time you told him his outfit was on point, or that his laugh was your favorite sound next to gospel music?
Maybe you’ve noticed he’s been hitting the home workouts during quarantine – a quick “Hey, Hercules, planning on parting the Red Sea next?” will get you some bonus points and probably a laugh.
Celebrating successes together.
If King David had a girlfriend when he defeated Goliath, you can bet she would’ve thrown him a victory bash. Whether your guy just landed a big client, managed to cook without burning the kitchen down, or finally defeated that video game boss, pop the metaphorical (or literal) champagne.
Like the Torah celebrates its heroes, highlight his achievements. Everyone loves a personal cheerleader.
Read: Non-Verbal Communication in Relationships
Acts of Service
Remember when Jesus washed the feet of His disciples? Talk about a grand act of service. I’m not saying you should grab your boyfriend’s feet – unless you’re both into that. But small gestures can scream louder than any shout.
Daily rituals.
Does he always forget where he left his keys? Place them on the hook for him. Is he trying to cut down on his five daily coffees? Make him a green tea in the morning.
These little habits might seem trivial, but they accumulate like the wisdom in Proverbs. Over time, they say, “I know you, I see you, and I care.”
Surprise acts.
Every now and then, switch things up. If he’s been pulling long hours at work, order his favorite takeaway. Maybe even attempt to make his grandma’s secret chicken soup recipe (keyword: attempt).
As the Dhammapada says, “Little by little, a person becomes evil, as a water pot is filled by drops of water… Little by little, a person becomes good, as a water pot is filled by drops of water.”
Think of your surprise acts as those little drops filling your relationship pot.
Genuine appreciation isn’t just saying “thank you.” It’s about consistently showing your partner that they are seen, loved, and valued – even when they’re 100% sure socks with sandals is a fashion statement.
10. Overcome Challenges Together
Stand as a United Front
When Moses parted the Red Sea, it wasn’t a solo act – he had Aaron by his side and a staff from God. Yeah, your relationship challenges might not involve pharaohs or giant bodies of water, but you catch my drift.
When trials storm in like unexpected rain on your outdoor BBQ, remember: it’s you and him against the problem, not you against him.
The importance of partnership in hard times.
Your car breaks down in the middle of nowhere, and his phone’s GPS decides to act like it’s on a spiritual retreat – not working. Before you lose it and consider becoming a hermit, take a deep breath.
Two heads are better than one, especially when one might be freaking out.
As Ecclesiastes 4:9-10 reminds us, “Two are better than one because they have a good reward for their toil. For if they fall, one will lift up his fellow.” Be each other’s lift, not the added weight.
Using challenges as growth opportunities.
Look, nobody wakes up and thinks, “Oh, I hope today is filled with unexpected problems!” But, like surprise quizzes or unscheduled fire drills, they happen. How you respond defines the outcome.
When faced with a challenge, instead of playing the blame game or diving deep into the “why me?” pit, ask, “What can we learn?” Believe it or not, challenges can be like spiritual gym sessions.
As Buddha once said, “Every experience, no matter how bad it seems, holds within it a blessing of some kind. The goal is to find it.” So, spot the blessing, lift it, and flex those spiritual growth muscles together!
Facing adversities might not be on anyone’s relationship wishlist, but think of it as the secret level in a video game. It’s unexpected, a bit tough, but oh, the rewards! Gold coins or deeper connection? I’d bet on the latter.
Read: How to Deal with Breakups
Love, my friends, is like maintaining a vintage car. Sure, it’s classic, beautiful, and can give you the ride of your life, but if you leave it in the garage and never change the oil, don’t be shocked when it doesn’t start on a chilly morning.
The journey of love requires consistent effort.
Remember David and his sling? Goliath didn’t stand a chance because David practiced slinging stones daily. Love is kind of the same, minus the giants. If you think buying flowers on Valentine’s Day is your one-way ticket to eternal happiness, I’ve got some oceanfront property in Arizona to sell you.
It’s the daily acts, the small gestures, the whispered secrets at 2 am that keep the engine purring. As our dear friend Proverbs 17:17 says, “A friend loves at all times.” So, let’s put in the work, not just on the sunny days.
The importance of adapting and evolving together.
You’ve heard of the old wines getting better, right? Relationships can too. But it’s not about sitting and gathering dust; it’s about fermenting, adapting to the bottle’s curves, and embracing change.
From the teachings of Buddhism, “Change is never painful, only resistance to change is.” So, when life tosses you lemons, or better yet, a whole lemon orchard, make lemonade, lemon pie, and even some lemon-scented candles, but do it together!
God bless, Amen.
Frequently Asked Questions (FAQs)
How do you keep a relationship fresh and exciting?
Keeping a relationship vibrant requires effort, much like maintaining that hipster beard or those trendy succulent plants. Think of regular date nights – and no, Netflix binges don’t always count.
Dive into new activities together, maybe a salsa class? Or pottery? Basically, anything that doesn’t involve your couch. And never underestimate the power of good ol’ fashioned talk.
Open communication is the secret sauce to keep things zesty.
How important is personal space in a relationship?
Let’s put it this way: you love chocolate cake, right? But eat it every day, and you might turn into a cake (or wish you hadn’t seen it for a while). Personal space is like a palate cleanser.
It’s not about getting away from each other, but about giving room to grow, breathe, and miss each other. And as we grow individually, we bring back more to the table, enriching the relationship fondue.
How can couples handle financial disagreements?
Money talks can be as prickly as sitting on a cactus, but they don’t have to be. It’s all about the three R’s: Respect, Realism, and Regular check-ins. Understand that money views are often ingrained from our upbringings.
So, cherish the financial transparency, dream together by setting joint goals (like that Bahamas cruise), and always respect each other’s money mindset.
As they say in the spiritual world, “Treasure lies not in the pocket, but in the heart.” Or something like that.
What can couples do if they feel the romance is fading?
First off, don’t hit the panic button. Think of love as a fire; sometimes, it’s a roaring blaze, other times, cozy embers. When the flames seem low, throw in some novelty kindling.
Communicate (yes, again with the talking), remember why you fell in love, recreate your first date, or even seek counseling. Sometimes, you just need a little nudge to relight the fire.
How often should couples have deep, meaningful conversations?
Ah, the depths of the soul chats! While it’s great to talk about the latest reality show drama or that funny cat video, it’s the deep dives that fortify the relationship ship.
Now, you don’t need to plunge into philosophical debates daily, but don’t keep those feelings bottled up like last year’s homemade kombucha. Let them flow whenever the moment feels right or when either of you needs a heart-to-heart.
Remember, it’s quality over quantity.
