Questions to Ask Your Christian Boyfriend

You know the feeling: butterflies in your stomach, heart racing, and that goofy grin you can’t seem to wipe off your face when you’re with your boyfriend. But as much fun as the honeymoon stage is, it’s crucial to dig deeper and really get to know each other on a spiritual level.

After all, Proverbs 27:17 reminds us, “As iron sharpens iron, so one person sharpens another.” So, prepare to ask those essential questions that’ll help you explore each other’s beliefs, values, and what makes your relationship truly God-centered.

a man and a woman dancing in a fairy tale

Faith and Spiritual Life

How did you come to know Christ?

Starting with the basics, it’s always fascinating to learn about someone’s journey to Christ. Whether he was a young believer sitting in Sunday school or had a life-altering experience later on, getting to know his testimony is like reading the prologue of a great book.

How important is your faith in your everyday life?

Here’s where the rubber meets the road. Is his faith just a Sunday morning routine, or does it permeate every aspect of his life? Matthew 5:16 reminds us, “In the same way, let your light shine before others, that they may see your good deeds and glorify your Father in heaven.” So, make sure his light is shining bright!

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How do you practice your faith daily?

Whether it’s prayer, Bible study, or worship, everyone has their unique way of connecting with God. Discovering how your boyfriend practices his faith daily can give you insight into his spiritual habits, and maybe even inspire you to try something new.

How important is it for you to attend church regularly?

Hebrews 10:25 says, “Not giving up meeting together, as some are in the habit of doing, but encouraging one another – and all the more as you see the Day approaching.” Attending church regularly is vital for spiritual growth and fellowship. Make sure you’re on the same page when it comes to the importance of being part of a faith community.

What role does prayer play in your life?

1 Thessalonians 5:17 tells us to “pray continually.” So, it’s essential to know if your boyfriend’s prayer life resembles a non-stop chat with God or if it only happens during emergencies. It’s also an excellent opportunity to discover how you can pray for each other and grow together in this area.

Do you believe in spiritual gifts? If so, what are your gifts?

Diving into the topic of spiritual gifts can spark some intriguing conversations about how God has uniquely equipped each of you to serve Him. Discussing your gifts and passions can lead to finding new ways to serve together as a couple, strengthening not only your faith but also your bond.

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How do you handle doubts or challenges to your faith?

It’s normal for everyone to have doubts or face challenges in their faith journey. The important thing is how we handle them. Knowing your boyfriend’s strategy for dealing with these moments can help you understand and support him better when those times come.

What are your favorite Bible verses or stories, and why?

Bible verses and stories often hold special meaning for individuals based on their personal experiences and faith journey. Asking your boyfriend about his favorites can offer a glimpse into what resonates with him and provides a deeper understanding of his faith. Plus, it’s always great to learn more about the Word of God together!

Relationships and Communication

How do you approach conflict resolution in a relationship?

Nobody enjoys conflicts, but they’re an inevitable part of any relationship. So, it’s crucial to know if your boyfriend is a “let’s talk it out” or “I’ll just bottle it up” kind of guy. After all, healthy communication is the key to resolving issues and growing together.

How important is open and honest communication to you?

Ephesians 4:25 says, “Therefore each of you must put off falsehood and speak truthfully to your neighbor, for we are all members of one body.” Honesty and openness are essential for building trust in any relationship. Ensure you both value and practice transparent communication to create a strong foundation for your partnership.

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How do you handle disagreements about faith or theology?

Whether it’s a debate on predestination or differing opinions on worship styles, disagreements on faith matters can arise. The key is how you handle these discussions. Knowing your boyfriend’s approach to theological differences will help you navigate these conversations with grace, understanding, and mutual respect.

What role does forgiveness play in your relationships?

Forgiveness is a powerful tool in any relationship, and as Christians, we’re called to forgive others just as Christ forgave us (Colossians 3:13). Make sure you both understand the importance of forgiveness and have strategies for seeking and granting it when needed.

How can we support each other’s spiritual growth as a couple?

Iron sharpens iron, right? (Proverbs 27:17) So, it’s essential to know how you can encourage and challenge each other in your walk with God. Discussing ways to support each other’s spiritual growth fosters a deeper connection and a shared sense of purpose in your relationship.

How do you feel about discussing our relationship with mentors or spiritual leaders?

Accountability and guidance from trusted mentors or spiritual leaders can be invaluable in navigating the ups and downs of a relationship. Make sure your boyfriend is comfortable with the idea of seeking counsel and discussing your relationship with others who can provide wisdom and support. Remember, we’re all in this together, and there’s no shame in seeking guidance along the way.

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Personal Growth and Development

What are your strengths and weaknesses in your faith journey?

We all have our areas of strength and those pesky weaknesses that we’d rather keep hidden. But hey, being honest about them is the first step towards growth. So, ask your boyfriend to share his spiritual superhero powers and kryptonite with you, so you can better understand and support each other on this faith adventure.

How do you handle stress or difficult situations?

Life throws curveballs left and right, and you want a guy who can handle them with grace and resilience. Whether he’s a prayer warrior or has a secret stash of chocolate for emergencies, knowing how your boyfriend copes with stress can help you better support and encourage him when the going gets tough.

What steps do you take to grow in your faith?

You don’t want a stagnant, lukewarm Christian by your side, right? (Revelation 3:16, anyone?) So, find out what your boyfriend does to actively grow in his faith and draw closer to God. It might even inspire you to up your own spiritual game.

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How do you hold yourself accountable in your Christian walk?

Accountability partners are like personal trainers for our spiritual lives. They help us stay on track and push us to reach new heights. So, make sure your boyfriend has a solid system in place to keep himself in check, whether that’s through trusted friends, mentors, or perhaps even you.

What role does community play in your spiritual development?

Christianity is a team sport, folks! We’re not meant to do this faith thing solo. So, ask your boyfriend about the importance of community in his spiritual life and how being part of a church family helps him grow and thrive in his walk with God.

Are there any areas of your life where you feel God is calling you to grow or change?

This question requires some vulnerability and honesty, but it can lead to powerful conversations about how God is working in both of your lives. So, take a deep breath, get real with each other, and see where the Lord is leading you as individuals and as a couple. Who knows, it might just be the start of an incredible new chapter in your faith journey together.

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Values and Ethics

How do your Christian values influence your decision-making process?

Let’s face it, life is full of tough choices. But we want a partner who knows how to make those decisions with God at the center. So, ask your boyfriend how his faith guides him when he’s faced with tricky situations or moral dilemmas. It’ll be like getting a sneak peek at his spiritual GPS.

How do you feel about topics such as premarital sex, alcohol consumption, or media consumption?

Hot topics alert! These are the kinds of questions that can spark some lively discussions (and maybe even some healthy debates). But hey, it’s important to know where each other stands on these issues and ensure your values align. Remember, you’re building a relationship on solid, Godly ground here.

What are your thoughts on tithing or financial stewardship?

Money matters might not be the most romantic topic, but it’s essential to discuss them before things get too serious. After all, 1 Timothy 6:10 warns us that “the love of money is a root of all kinds of evil.” So, find out if your boyfriend has a budget, if he believes in tithing, and how he views financial responsibility as a Christian.

How do you approach serving others and living out your faith in tangible ways?

James 2:17 tells us that “faith by itself, if it is not accompanied by action, is dead.” So, it’s crucial to have a partner who doesn’t just talk the talk but walks the walk. Ask your boyfriend about how he serves others, whether through volunteering, mission trips, or just being a good neighbor. Bonus points if you discover new opportunities to serve together!

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How do you feel about social justice issues and the role of Christians in addressing them?

Social justice issues can be complex and divisive, but as Christians, we’re called to “act justly, love mercy, and walk humbly with our God” (Micah 6:8). So, dive into a conversation about how your boyfriend views these issues and the role he believes Christians play in bringing about positive change. It’s not only eye-opening but can also inspire you both to make a difference in the world around you.

Future Plans and Goals

What are your long-term goals for your faith journey?

We all need a spiritual bucket list, right? So, ask your boyfriend about his long-term goals when it comes to his walk with God. Whether he dreams of becoming a pastor or simply wants to grow closer to the Lord each day, knowing his aspirations can help you both envision a future together built on a strong foundation of faith.

How do you envision your future family’s spiritual life?

Picture this: you’re married with kids (or fur babies), gathered around the dinner table for family devotions. Sounds great, doesn’t it? But first, you need to make sure your boyfriend shares that vision. Discuss how you both want your future family’s spiritual life to look like, from church involvement to family traditions and everything in between.

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What are your thoughts on raising children in the faith?

Proverbs 22:6 says, “Train up a child in the way he should go; even when he is old he will not depart from it.” So, it’s important to know how your boyfriend feels about raising little believers who love Jesus. Ask about his views on discipling kids, teaching them about the Bible, and involving them in church activities.

How important is it for you to have a partner who shares your faith?

Okay, let’s be real here: if you’re asking all these questions, it’s pretty clear that your faith is important to you. But it’s still worth discussing how essential a shared faith is in your relationship. After all, 2 Corinthians 6:14 reminds us not to be “unequally yoked with unbelievers.” So, make sure you’re both on the same page when it comes to the significance of your faith in your partnership.

How do you feel about the possibility of missionary work or other forms of ministry?

Is your boyfriend open to the idea of packing up and moving halfway across the world for Jesus? Or maybe he’s more into local outreach opportunities? Either way, discussing the possibility of missionary work or other forms of ministry can help you both discern where God might be leading you in the future. And who knows, you might just discover a shared passion for serving the Lord together in new and exciting ways!

Whew! That was quite the journey, wasn’t it? But by asking these questions and discussing your faith, goals, and values, you’ve laid the groundwork for a strong, Godly relationship.

Remember, it’s not about grilling each other with an interrogation-style Q&A session but fostering open, honest conversations that bring you closer together. So, keep exploring each other’s beliefs and values, and approach these talks with love, understanding, and grace.

God bless, Amen.