Every relationship, from Adam and Eve to Meghan and Harry, has its quirks.
And while we might think there’s a one-size-fits-all guide to love (probably tucked away in the self-help section of the bookstore), the reality is far more colorful.
Remember when Samson told Delilah all his secrets because of… love? Yeah, maybe not the best relationship model. But it does highlight that every love story has its unique dynamics.
In the age of Instagram-perfect couples and #RelationshipGoals, it’s easy to think there’s a “normal” way to do relationships.
But diving into the annals of history, literature, and yes, even those sacred texts, it’s clear that love has always danced to its own tune.
Whether it’s Romeo and Juliet’s impulsive decisions (spoiler: it didn’t end well) or Ruth’s unwavering commitment to Naomi, relationships have always been as diverse as the people in them.
Remember that time when Adam was chilling in the Garden of Eden, naming animals and enjoying the lush greenery?
Yeah, he had a direct line to God, but even he needed some alone time before Eve came into the picture. And when she did, it wasn’t like they were attached at the hip 24/7. They had their own things going on.
I mean, can you imagine Eve rolling her eyes every time Adam named another insect? “Another beetle, Adam? Really?”
Not being in constant contact
The Apostle Paul wrote letters, not hourly text messages. And while I’m sure the Corinthians were eager for his replies, they weren’t blowing up his donkey (the ancient equivalent of a phone, obviously) every five minutes.
There’s this modern myth that if you’re not in constant communication, your relationship is on the rocks. But let’s be real, even Romeo and Juliet had their off days. And we all know how that turned out.
Remember when Jesus would slip away from the crowds to have some alone time and pray? He understood the value of personal space and trust.
If the Son of God needed a breather now and then, surely we can give our partners an afternoon off without thinking they’ve run off with the milkman. Or the Amazon delivery guy.
Whichever is more relevant to your century.
Having your own “life”
Jane Austen, in all her wisdom, once wrote, “There is nothing I would not do for those who are really my friends.” But she didn’t say, “I’ll ditch my own interests and become a clone of my friends.” Balance, people, balance!
King Solomon, in his Proverbs-filled wisdom, didn’t say, “Thou shalt forsake all hobbies and sit around waiting for thy lover’s call.” Nope. He was too busy writing songs, giving advice, and managing a kingdom.
And if the wisest man in history can multitask, surely we can manage a date night and a book club.
Over-dependence? It’s like eating too much chocolate. Sure, it’s sweet at first, but then you’re left feeling sick and regretting your life choices. Celebrate your individuality!
Remember, God made you unique for a reason.
So, while it’s great to binge-watch “The Chosen” together, maybe you can also have a night where you dive into “Pride and Prejudice” and they tackle “Moby Dick”. Or vice versa.
Just remember to come up for air and share the best parts with each other.
Honesty and Communication Nuances
In the grand tapestry of love stories, from Adam and Eve to Kim and Kanye, there’s always been a bit of, well, “editing” when it comes to sharing.
And while Buddha might advocate for the middle path in all things, even he might raise an eyebrow at your need to share every single detail of your day, including that weird dream about llamas.
The Art of Selective Sharing
Remember when Ross from “Friends” didn’t tell Rachel about their annulment? Classic case of oversharing gone wrong. But on the flip side, you don’t need to narrate every time you change your socks.
There’s a sweet spot between being an open book and being a mystery wrapped in an enigma, sprinkled with riddles.
The ancient Greeks had two words for time: Chronos (sequential time) and Kairos (the right or opportune moment). Maybe we need a Kairos moment for sharing.
Like, do you really need to tell your partner about the three hours you spent watching cat videos? Unless it’s a hilarious cat video that they absolutely must see, perhaps some tales are best left untold.
Big Truths, Big Conversations
Shakespeare once wrote, “No legacy is so rich as honesty,” but I’m pretty sure he wasn’t talking about confessing to eating the last slice of pizza. There are big truths and little truths.
And while the Bible tells us that the truth shall set us free, it doesn’t necessarily mean every tiny truth about how you secretly think their new haircut looks like a broccoli floret.
But here’s the kicker: those big, looming, shadow-casting truths? They need airtime. Avoiding them is like ignoring that massive elephant doing the cha-cha in your living room.
Whether it’s a concern about future plans, or a need to set boundaries (like not bringing up your ex every time you see a bicycle because they loved cycling), these conversations are crucial.
Rumi, the poetic genius, once said, “Silence is the language of God.” But I’m betting he didn’t mean staying silent about the stuff that matters.
So, while you might not need to spill about every spider you saved or squished, when it comes to the heart of the matter, it’s time to channel your inner Oprah and have that heart-to-heart.
Challenging Conventional Wisdom
In the realm of relationships, there’s a buffet of advice out there. From the age-old wisdom of Solomon to the modern musings of Taylor Swift, everyone has something to say.
But sometimes, the most unconventional advice might just be the secret sauce to a lasting relationship.
Sleep on It, Seriously
Remember when Paul said in Ephesians, “Do not let the sun go down while you are still angry”? Well, I’m pretty sure he didn’t mean to hash out why the toilet seat was left up at 2 AM.
There’s this age-old belief that you should never, ever go to bed angry. But let’s be honest, sometimes after a long day, your brain’s about as functional as a chocolate teapot.
Ever read “Pride and Prejudice”? Elizabeth Bennet didn’t immediately confront Mr. Darcy about his apparent snobbery. She took her time, processed her feelings, and then delivered some of the most iconic burns in literary history.
Sometimes, a good night’s sleep can offer clarity, perspective, and the right words to express how you feel without throwing a shoe.
You Complete… Yourself
Jerry Maguire had us all swooning with “You complete me.” But if we look back to Genesis, God made individuals first. Adam was a whole dude in the garden before Eve came around.
And Eve? She wasn’t just Adam’s shadow; she was her own person with her own thoughts (and, okay, maybe a questionable choice in fruit).
Buddha talked about the middle path, and while he wasn’t exactly dishing out relationship advice, there’s something to be said about balance.
A relationship shouldn’t be two half-people clinging together like desperate Velcro. It should be two whole individuals, choosing to journey together.
C.S. Lewis once said, “When I have learnt to love God better than my earthly dearest, I shall love my earthly dearest better than I do now.”
In other words, when you’re complete in your faith and yourself, you bring a fuller, richer love to your relationship.
So, instead of looking for someone to complete you, maybe it’s about finding someone to complement you, like a perfectly paired wine and cheese. Or, for the millennials, avocado and toast.
Prioritizing Self-Care and Growth
In the whirlwind of “He’s Just Not That Into You” and “The Five Love Languages,” there’s a chapter often missing: the art of dating yourself. Yep, you heard me right.
Before diving into the deep end of coupledom, let’s paddle in the shallows of self-love first.
Embrace the “Me Time”
Moses had his 40 days on Mount Sinai, and Jesus had his 40 days in the desert.
Now, I’m not saying you need to go MIA for over a month (your job might not appreciate that), but there’s something biblical about taking time for oneself.
It’s not about being antisocial or giving your partner the cold shoulder. It’s about reconnecting with yourself, your goals, and, well, God.
Ever read “Eat, Pray, Love”? Elizabeth Gilbert didn’t find love until she took a year off to discover herself.
And while a trip to Italy might be out of the budget, a solo date to your local pizzeria might be just what the doctor (or pastor) ordered.
The Sound of Silence
In a world of constant chatter, from Twitter notifications to those pesky group chats that never sleep, there’s a revolutionary idea: silent days.
No, it’s not some medieval torture technique. It’s a day where you and your partner communicate without words.
King David wrote entire Psalms about meditation and reflection. And while he might’ve had a harp instead of an iPhone, the principle remains. Taking a break from the verbal volleys can lead to deeper understanding.
Remember that game of charades where your cousin tried to act out “The Chronicles of Narnia”? Hilarious, right?
Now imagine a day of that with your partner. It’s about reading each other’s non-verbal cues, from a raised eyebrow to that specific smirk that means “You owe me chocolate.”
In the words of Aldous Huxley, “After silence, that which comes nearest to expressing the inexpressible is music.”
So, why not make your relationship a symphony of understanding, even if it means hitting the mute button once in a while?
Bonus Unconventional Relationship Tips (For You!)
In the vast universe of relationship advice, from the wisdom of Solomon to the modern-day musings of Dr. Phil, there are some tips that might make you raise an eyebrow. Or both.
But hey, if Noah building an ark before rain was a thing worked out, maybe these quirky tips have some merit too.
Walk a Mile in Their Shoes… or Slippers
Ever wondered why Peter always forgets to take out the trash or why Mary spends so much time deciding which shoes to wear?
Enter the “Reverse Role Days.” It’s like “Freaky Friday” but without the weird mom-daughter switch.
Spend a day doing what your partner usually does. You might just find out that choosing the perfect pair of shoes is an art form or that taking out the trash is a task of Herculean proportions.
Remember Ruth and Boaz? While they didn’t exactly swap roles, Ruth sure did step out of her comfort zone to glean in those fields. And look how that turned out: a love story for the ages.
Two Rooms, One Roof
Now, before you gasp in horror, hear me out. “Separate Bedrooms” doesn’t mean you’re channeling your inner Victorian. It’s about recognizing that sometimes, we all need a little space.
Even Jesus took time away from his disciples to pray and reflect.
Jane Austen, the queen of romance, once wrote about the importance of personal space in relationships. Well, not in so many words, but between the lines of “Pride and Prejudice,” there’s a message about understanding and respecting individuality.
Talk to Me, But Don’t Look at Me
“Blindfolded Conversations” might sound like a game show challenge, but it’s more profound than that. Without visual distractions, you’re forced to truly listen.
It’s like that time in the Bible when God spoke to Samuel in the stillness of the night. Sometimes, to truly hear, we need to shut out other senses.
Shakespeare, amidst his tales of star-crossed lovers and mischievous fairies, highlighted the power of voice and listening. So, pop on that blindfold and dive deep into conversation. Just make sure you’re seated first.
Solo Adventures Await
Taking solo vacations might sound like something out of a self-discovery novel, but there’s wisdom in it. Remember when Moses went up Mount Sinai alone? He came back with the Ten Commandments.
Not saying you’ll come back with a new set of life rules, but a little time apart can make the heart grow fonder.
Gandhi once said, “In the attitude of silence, the soul finds the path in a clearer light.” Sometimes, that path is a solo trip to a beach, a mountain, or even just a weekend retreat.
When you return, you’ll not only have stories to share but also a renewed appreciation for each other.
Navigating the waters of love is like trying to follow a recipe from the Great British Bake Off without any measurements. It’s messy, unpredictable, and sometimes you end up with a soggy bottom.
But that’s where the magic happens. Finding what works for your unique relationship is the secret ingredient.
Maybe it’s a weekly game night, or perhaps it’s separate Netflix accounts because one of you can’t resist binge-watching ahead. Whatever it is, embrace it.
Growth and change in relationships are as inevitable as the changing seasons. Even the great King Solomon, with all his wisdom, couldn’t keep things static.
And let’s not forget Elizabeth Bennet and Mr. Darcy, whose love story was all about personal growth and understanding.
Embracing change, whether it’s a new job, a move, or just trying out one of these weird relationship tips, is what keeps the relationship alive and kicking.
In the words of the great theologian (and by theologian, I mean pop star) Taylor Swift, “You are in love, true love.” And true love is all about finding your rhythm, even if it’s a little offbeat.